New Food and Beverage Operations Manager

Effective Monday, December 6, my husband will be taking over all food and beverage operations in the household. The decision came earlier in the week when he, much aggrieved by endless clutter in the cabinets and fridge and in a state of terrible hunger due to the paltry meal of Trader Joe’s frozen Pizza Margherita (with lettuce and an inedible lime dressing on the side), realized that all luncheon meat had passed expiration. Other options in the cabinet included items such as raisins, canned beans, Ziplock bags of old crackers, and four flavors of applesauce. The decision was finalized the next morning when both bananas and Chex Bran, the top two breakfast options of the household, were unavailable.



I have been applauded for my nearly 10 years of food and beverage service. My attempts at pork chops and any type of roast, though always tough and dry, were appreciated. The bland vegetable lasagnas and mushy fried rice not so much. Some of my more successful dishes – creamy tomato soup, arroz con pollo, Trader Joe’s orange chicken, spaghetti bolognaise, and sausage gravy will likely stay on the menu.


The coupon drawer, which is frequently stocked, will most likely be reorganized since none of the coupons have ever actually been used. And we will likely see the third shelf, second cabinet – usually reserved for wasabi peas, flax seed oil, vegetable-flavored crackers, and other items that marketers have forced me to buy in the past and I cannot force myself to choke down – cleared and restocked with staples like dried peppers, canned tomatoes, and peanut butter.


We are looking forward to a more productive and user-friendly kitchen, along with a variety of international cuisines and flavors. Though I will still participate in the preparation of some of the meals, the planning, stocking, and overall operation management will be provided by my husband.


Now that I have been relieved of these duties, we are also looking forward to weeknights that are slightly more peaceful, a laundry room that one can walk through, and a bit of dusting occurring throughout the week.